Not all experiences of physical love are equally profound, but sex certainly breaks the surface tension of superficial relating! Experiences of shared pleasure certainly CAN help people bond. How sweet it is!
Of course, love communion can be far more than just pleasurable. Experiences of sexual rapture open us up to depths of INTIMACY far beyond what we might otherwise tend to create.
Desire-powered bonding
Intense sexual passion derives special bonding power from its ability to enliven our senses and AMPLIFY experience. As people ascend in energy and vibrancy, perceptions sharpen. At a certain point of passion, we begin to see and feel everything about the event in keen and vivid detail. The reality of our lover burns brightly into our awareness.
Everything we find beautiful about them is MORE beautiful, more MEMORABLE, and yet, at the same time, mysteriously FAMILIAR. After a few hours of passion, we feel that we know our lover intimately -- far better than we would after weeks or even months of ordinary social contact.
The bond created in lovemaking naturally tends to be strong, for these reasons:
1. It is joyful to be connected, and NOT alone. Since the vivid feeling of deep connection is delicious to experience and to remember, lovers naturally think long and lovingly of each other when they're apart. Each time they do, they feed their bond.
2. Lovers eagerly look forward to seeing each other again. And needless to say, that positive anticipation and loving recollection maximizes the quality of subsequent meetings.
3. Wonderful associations create high motivation to KEEP their love connection strong. Passionate lovers frequently create positive incidents that reinforce their bond, and do everything they can to heal the relationship when problems appear.
All those factors combine to create powerful feelings of affinity.
Bonded to loving
We attach ourselves strongly to particular people we love. And therefore, at times, the prospect of living without a loved one may seem insufferable. But more to the point, living without LOVE is insufferable.
Our loved ones bring into our lives the joy of loving them. LOVING brings the joy. We all need the JOY that loving brings. We all need the PURPOSE that loving brings. Ultimately, although the bond we feel with our beloved seems to spring from our animal side, it is deeply rooted in our spiritual nature. The more deeply and truly we LOVE, the more we want to keep loving.
Desire penetrates the walls of difference
Love leads us on and on, higher and deeper into relationship. Desire creates its social bonds in progressive ways. First, it penetrates through the walls of DIFFERENCE. Many songs and movies celebrate the power of love-desire to bring together people of different backgrounds, different cultures, different aspirations.
How DIFFERENT the native girl and the English officer are, in this movie scene. And how irrelevant that is in the eyes of desire.
Desire makes shy people outgoing, and even gives us affinity for people with whom we seemed to have nothing in common. The movie excerpt below portrays another unlikely couple: an older woman seducing a young man. Here again, a strong state of desire pierces though the walls of difference.
Obviously, for the moment at least, her desire is stronger than his. And, being so full of desire, she certainly feels less different from HIM than he feels from HER. Interesting! And yet, if she has her way with him, he'll feel soon a whole lot LESS different.
Ascending love's ladder
Once it overcomes our reservations based on superficial differences, desire opens our eyes to deeper splendors.
In the Higher Consciousness section, we explained how the higher energies of desire and passion can put us in touch with who we truly are. That same higher consciousness can show us who OTHERS truly are. It is a process of unraveling the layers, moving into the core:
Love, then, is FAR from blind. Closer to the truth, love has x-ray vision: It sees THROUGH the flaws and differences of others, clear to the heart and soul. And without a doubt, the result is devotion, perhaps even awe.
When we see the true inner Self of our beloved, we find it completely loveable. We recognize their inner Self as akin to ours –- perhaps even the SAME as ours. The result is profound affinity. Deep bonding.
Sameness and uniqueness
The awareness of essential sameness does NOT blind us to uniqueness, or to details of difference. Loving eyes are SO perceptive of the subtle nuances in consciousness, and even the smallest physical details. So, although love and desire at first ignore differences and later see beyond them, lovers are not unaware of the differences between them. In fact, lovers CHERISH the differences, the uniqueness of personality. Vive la difference, right?
How sameness INCLUDES uniqueness
As you see, what's MOST amazing about loving eyes is their SCOPE of vision: loving eyes excel in their ability to perceive both sameness AND uniqueness. And in our loving eyes, both sameness and difference powerfully contribute to affinity and bonding.
In higher consciousness, sameness and uniqueness (or difference) are NOT opposites. Rather, sameness INCLUDES uniqueness. A most sublime paradox! And that's exactly what makes higher love POSSIBLE on earth. If you can see the sameness, and at the same time notice and appreciate the differences, you have what love requires.
How desire revives faded love
To this point, we've been talking how desire helps build the foundations of love. What about the renewal of past love? What about the rebuilding of affinity after love's spark has faded, or practically died out? Sometimes, when desire raises its lovely head, it can help heal relationships, by restoring levels of affinity we may have believed we had lost forever.
Loneliness, skin hunger -- and yes, the inner dog -- all contribute some motivation for reconciliation. Perhaps the combination is enough to overcome the natural resistance to picking up the phone.
A couple has a big fight, breaks up, and doesn't see or speak to each other for a month. For a while afterward, the fight gives them negative associations with the relationship and each other's character, and those impressions keep them apart. But after some time, the individuals heal from the trauma of their fight, and their vital energy begins to rise again. And eventually, they feel DESIRE. Finally, late one night, one of them picks up the phone and calls the other: "Honey, I miss you."Click here for audio version of this paragraph.
Psychic Connection
"I'll be thinking of you."
Though we often associate relationship with physical togetherness, we know better. Whenever we ask a loved one to remember us while we're away, we are acknowledging our intuitive understanding of the real truth: relationship is in the MIND. Which makes sense of the fact that . . .
1. People can be at a huge EMOTIONAL distance even when they're PHYSICALLY in the same bed.
And . . .
2. People can enjoy great and real CLOSENESS even when they are physically DISTANT from one another.
What is a relationship? Relationship is essentially an etheric reality. A relationship is something that exists in the mind of two people. In other words, how you relate is a mental thing. It is an emotional thing, which is a part of the mental etheric dimension. Emotions are not physical things. So, creating a relationship begins, and in a real sense ends, in the etheric.
By now you must be wondering, if relationship is all in the MIND, where does the sex part fit in? Here's where: Desire strongly IMPACTS how – and to what DEGREE -- we hold each other in our minds.
In your mind you can create your relationship with your significant others. Once you've created a relationship with someone, when you go to see them, you find the relationship that you've created there. When you walk in the room, that relationship is there. It is. Meaning, it has already been created; what you'll find is the exact relationship that you've actually already created.
Our basic need for psychic connection
In psychic connection, we relate directly. And in relating directly, we experience a direct emotional response that goes straight to the heart. Therefore, psychic connection circumvents the myriad complications and limitations that plague relationships that depend PRIMARILY on physical exchange.
Psychic connection is a natural experience for human beings, but due to low vibration, separative presumptions, and social fears, many of us rarely extend ourselves enough to make psychic contact with others – even our "loved ones." So, we may feel strongly connected only rarely.
If we neglect to presume deep relatedness and closeness with others, we suffer numerous secondary problems (identity crises, feelings of insecurity, alienation, perhaps even desperation) -- all arising from emotional starvation. Our nagging emotional hunger tends to make us feel irritable, unloved, and unloving. And those feelings, in turn, lead us to create difficult and off-putting exchanges with others that simply reinforce our subjective experience of separation. Finally, we end up trying to heal all these secondary problems in physical meetings: "I've just got to talk to you, because all these things are bothering me."
The hitch is, no amount of meeting and talking and being together can make someone feel close when they are presuming distance. Usually, such meetings only put band-aids over deeper problems that still remain. And many times, the meetings feed problem-consciousness so much, they make things worse. Without a doubt, the solution lies elsewhere. The answer, dear friends, is blowing in the etheric wind. In other words:
Only true closeness -- REAL emotional/psychic connection/exchange -- can cure alienation at the root.
To the extent that we etherically connect, the RESULTING sense of fullness and fulfillment keeps affinity high and bright, which prevents MOST relationship problems from ever occurring. And, that wealth of health almost always heals any problems that do arise.
But there is so much more to this psychic connection business than problem-prevention. Psychic connection holds the key to FULFILLMENT – fulfillment of the implicit goal of relationship:
Etheric connection, not mere physical association, IS the implicit goal of all real relationships. And etheric relationship, as we've said many times, is relationship. And etheric connection is connection. There is no other relationship. There is no other connection that means anything.
How to create psychic connection
So, exactly how DO we . . .
•
•
•
overcome our habitual feelings of distance
break the vicious circle of off-putting experiences, and
CONNECT deeply?
Well, here's one handy way:
CALL THE DOG!
WHY does it help to call the dog? Because of how well the inner dog contributes higher energy to psychic connection. Real quick, here's how that works:
When you fan sexual desire, you raise energy. Higher energy expands consciousness. Expanded consciousness, in turn, allows for true psychic connection! We're not just talking about sexual fantasy here, although by its very nature sexual fantasy proves this point. We're really talking about love-desire, remembrance. We're talking about higher affinity.
For example, in higher energy states, if we think about someone with love, we can generate a strong feeling of attunement whether we're in their physical presence or not.
"It always feels like you are with me. Sometimes when I sit down to write you a letter, I feel as if you are right here watching me write it anyway. We're always together, whether we're together or not, that's the beauty of it. Isn't that wonderful? You and I are holding hands right now, even though you're on the other side of the ocean. Well, I do wish I was there. I want to be able to do things for you, little things, a whole lot of things, that I can't do from here. I love you, with all my heart. I love you."
When we are psychically attuned, we can feel some of the inner changes and thoughts our partner or partners go through, even without words. It's like when we're with a friend, and we "SEE" a cloud come across their face, or we sense a sudden bright thought passing through their mind, and we say, "What's up?" -- THAT kind of sensitivity. The higher our energy is, the more sensitive we are on that level.
The inner dog gives us one of the easiest and most direct ways to tear down our imagined barriers and join in real love communion. But there are other EXTREMELY effective ways to connect that are purely meditative. [For example, Unification, as we practice and teach it here at the LLF, is one of them. For information about Unification, click here].
Soul union
When we speak of psychic connection, words like clairvoyance and mind reading often come to mind. But as we see it, at least, mind reading is not the point of psychic connection -- soul COMMUNION is, and soul UNION is.
Connection is a means of blending souls. It is said, "You become what (or who) you meditate on." By contemplating a beloved person or object, we can create a psychic connection and strengthen our connection -- to the point of spiritual union.
Thus, psychic connection satisfies the immediate and eternal social drive towards soul merger. By so doing, it dissolves deep-rooted, long-standing fears -- fears of irresolvable difference, distance, loneliness, and the like -- that are inherent in the ordinary experience of egoic survival-orientation, and in all lonely lives of psychic DISconnection.
Being connected to all of life
Until now, we've spoken about psychic connection to a beloved, or to specific loved ones. But it's undeniably true: when we are in a high energy state, we're gladder to see EVERYBODY. We're connected not only to one special person, or to a few familiar faces, but to Life altogether. That all-encompassing connection to life is a wonderful thing.
And the greatest wonder is, how naturally and easily higher energy and love-desire can help establish that Universal connection. Thanks, Rover! Good dog!
NOTE: In the final article of this series, we are going to speak about the mystical potentials of sex and desire. More consideration of universal aspects of psychic connection will be given at that time.
Sexually charged lovers are magnetized to each other in a way that everyone around them feels. Influential or powerful people cast a similar spell with their powerful auras, charisma, and personal magnetism. In public OR private relationships, what is this charisma, this magnetism? It's ENERGY!
It certainly helps, energy-wise, to perform on stage before five thousand adoring fans. But stars have no patent on energy. Hey, ANYONE who has electricity and delivers it has magnetic power. Remember YOUR OWN peak experiences, your own mountaintop moments of love? Well then, "you da man" – or woman!
Energy powerfully shapes ALL human relationships. Energy is soul food. Always. And for everyone. And HIGHER energy is always the top draw, the kodacolor moment, the jewel of relationship. Higher energy is the thing most wanted and needed -- the gift that’s always appreciated when given, and always missed when withheld.
Charisma of passionate energy
So, how do we tap into that higher power and glory, that charisma-creating energy? If you want energy, the answer is: Get a life! Even better: get Life! How? Fan DESIRE. Desire brings Life to life.
Desire means passion -- and passion is POWER. Any person who lives with passion carries incredible clout in the world of human emotion. Such a person has charisma and allure dreamers only dream of.
Crowds stand in line for a hit of the healing energy that flows through people of passion. PASSION is what makes great leaders great, persuasive speakers persuasive -- and lovers attractive. And it doesn't seem to matter too much whether the passion is quiet and subdued, or wild and extroverted: passion in any form is very hard to resist.
Call it seduction, charisma, magnetism, or whatever you will. But never say that such things are necessarily bad -- or that everyone who becomes radiant, magnetic, charming, attractive, and persuasive will take advantage of others. Many of the world’s greatest men -- Jesus, Gandhi, Buddha, among thousands of others -- were charismatic. But these great souls were FAR from evil.
We dare not criticize even sucky forms of passion. Doesn't it take COURAGE to express deep desire in ANY form? Try it, and see for yourself! And doesn't it feel good to BE desired to that degree? If you've ever experienced it yourself, you know!
Click the play button to play, click the pause button to stop.
Peace of the action
Life goes on within us and without, but somewhere in all that madness, we all need a Peace of the action. We find that Peace in fullness, and we give that Peace FROM fullness.
Can you FEEL it? To the extent that you have SUFFICIENT energy, INNER energy flows OUTWARD, touching and enlivening everyone in range. But of course, one must have energy to give energy. One must even have energy to GET energy – to draw energy from others. The rich get richer. But what about the poor?
The woods of life can be dark and dreary. We've got to be resourceful to get into the clearing! There are many ways to raise energy, every one of them valid, but it's often EASIEST to create passion using sex. What makes sexual passion so spiritually useful is how nicely it falls to hand.
Sex is NOT nirvana, but sex CAN help us get there. Don't be ashamed of sex – USE it, and use it wisely. Sex can raise energy fast. As it does, notice the DIFFERENCES between lower and higher energy states. And when you ACHIEVE that higher state, use IT wisely, too. Use it to love. To love brighter, higher, and wider.
Use the spaces below to submit feedback directly to LoveTrust via e-mail. You can write as much as you like in the comments area.
When you are done, click the "Send Feedback" button.
If you appreciate what we're doing, we would appreciate your support
We work hard, every single day of our lives, to do what we do, to delve as deep as we do, to put it out as far as we do, to do it to the high standards that we always seek to meet. There is so much more we would do, if we had the resources to do it.
We know that you appreciate what we're doing. We've received thanks from many of you. When we appreciate anything that much, we WANT to support it. That's how we live. We give from our pockets as well as from our hearts.
We ask you to consider whether you would want to do the same for us.
